Every day I see double digit males coming into the findom scene whom have absolutely no idea of what it means to serve. Now I do not fault you for not knowing how to go about things in the beginning,we have all been there at one point in time(being the new face or wallet so to speak) on the block. It can be overwhelming if you allow it to be.
Suddenly your inbox is under siege and blown up with offers and demands to serve. You slip into a euphoric feeling of stroked ego. It feels good to have so many females chasing after you,then the blow is dealt that it is not really you they want,but what you can offer. How low your self-esteem must be after learning the fact...or maybe you are the rare specimen that thrives on being used financially sans any return benefits. Either way unless you want to sink under the weight of the expectations placed upon you,your best route is to educate yourself about what this fetish entails,the good,the bad,and even the ugly. The effects of this fetish do travel over into your everyday life(money matters in every aspect of your existence). Goddess Belladonna,and Dr.Sue both have written some amazingly accurate posts about how to serve a dominant online. Take advantage of their expanded base of knowledge. It will provide you with atleast the basic knowledge of how to be a financial submissive..hell even a submissive itself. By educating yourself,you will be better equipped to take the first step towards serving or at the very least the ability to recognize that you are not meant to serve. There is nothing wrong with trying out different areas of submission,nor should you fear saying "This just isn't for me".
For now I will share some tips and advice with you.You definitely do not need to enter this arena if you cannot even support yourself. You should not come here if you are seeking a sexual relationship(femdom,nor findom are based on intercourse). Learn your limitations financially before you ever engage in a session or service. It is too easy to get all excited mentally and physically when you are interacting with a dominant women,that before you know it,you have blown your wad,and your paycheck. Now you are hurting,and not in a good way. I am not in any way advocating that you lie about your finances,but I am saying that you need to be upfront about what you can afford. Keep in mind that I am referring to your remaining finances after your bills and necessary expenditures,and yes you can live without starbucks lol.
Another thing to remember is that how you present yourself will be remembered. Do not ever consider putting out a lie of any kind. If you are not well off,then do not attempt to cast out a line of bait stating that you are as 1)you will draw sharks into your calm waters(they will rip you to shreds in a bloody way),and 2)you will be called upon the carpet to produce. If you are assuming that ladies do not share details with each other about the poor behavior of males,then you truly are making an ass of yourself,and this is not an attractive label,nor easy to slough off. Always put your best foot forward. Be polite when speaking with a lady even if she is not what you seek. Dominants are humans yes,but our egos should be thick enough to accept that there is no connection,so do not string her along to save her feelings. Honesty is ALWAYS your best policy. There is a way of stating your lack of interest without it being offensive though,so steer clear of insults or the rudeness of ignoring or blocking without providing an explanation.
Do not allow yourself to forget that there is a living breathing human being behind the monitor. She is not an inanimate blow up pleasure providing doll. Think of it like this,if you were to meet her face to face in public like you do hundreds of others,would you still say the things you say? If not,then you need to reconsider how you approach her. Being on the internet does not give you license to act like a sex talk starved dick displaying idiot. This type of behavior is suited to the animal kingdom not a submissive male. You are held to a higher standard than the lame pick up artists at the local watering hole. Showing respect to a woman is not shameful,it is just plain decent.
TBC......
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