If you are a faithful reader of my blog,than you are already aware that I am a realist vs a fantasist. I fear that there are very few of my ilk within the fetish scene,or at the least,we would be a scarce minority. Some of my newest readers who are yet stumbling around searching for the reason that they have even entered into this realm may be wondering "what is the difference between the two"?
The answer I provide is based solely upon my personal opinion(which you are free to agree or disagree with). It stands to reason that a strong factor in many seeking out this lifestyle is fantasy,especially for you of the male orientation. It is known that males are led by their sexual appendages. They follow that which arouses them,whether it be visual or audio...so with all of the Femdom clips produced and marketed daily towards the enticement of male attention,is it difficult to believe that males are finding their way into the Femdom scene by the droves? Of course not.
Femdom is a lifestyle of wonder and empowerment. Empowerment is a powerful word. Truth be that not only are women empowered by the service of males,but the males themselves are empowered as well. As odd as that last statement sounds,in my mind it is accurate entirely. How would it not be empowering for a male to finally accept the purpose he was created for? No longer must he drift along not knowing why he is here,why he exists. He is gifted with meaning,and that meaning involves the relinquishment of all that he once believed to be true,and that in itself is a frightening prospect. Imagine if you were thrown into a society of which you were ignorant of the basic rules..daunting is it not? Yet those males of fortitude and the driven desire to immerse themselves within their destined role are possessed of strength. A strength which allows them to bend themselves to the will of another. They take upon themselves the dissolution of past behaviors ingrained by patriarchal society,and are set free from the constraints of public bindings of dictated male behavior. Their reward being that they are free. No longer a subject of conformity governed by the masses,instead they are subject to the rules of only ONE. Empowered!
Where the muddy waters flow is in the mind of the fantasist. He is a visitor in the foreign land of Femdom. Note I did not say a resident,for he is not meant to stay. Like a dreamer he escapes to this mythical realm to play out his darkest desires,but lacks the wherewithal to dwell where he cannot make the rules. He is burdened with the belief that he is entitled to call the shots as they pertain to his postulating protuberances. In many ways he reminds me of a child. A child who is set upon having things his way,and where he is the center of his own universe,which is true for the majority of human beings we share this earth with,so it is not surprising to see it so very often. He views Dommes as a means to a sticky handed end. His pleasure,and the pursuit of it sets the course of his actions. His agenda remains fixated upon himself,so he is definitely not a viable candidate for citizenry of Femdom. I say not that he has no place,merely that not one permanently. He will find what he seeks,have no doubt about that fact. Femdom offers many of those that for a price will indeed bring his arousal to culmination,so you see he fits into that sphere quite well,even if he is grossly unfit to serve for more than a jack off session.
The realist is one who engages in order to find a way to incorporate Femdom into their everyday life,and yes this is a possibility if one really wants it to be more than a waking dream. It is the rare few who are able to accomplish the transition,and this is why these males are worthy jewels within the crown of a Queen :) They make every struggle a Domme endures wading through the cesspool of misogynists worth the effort. To the select few I tip my imaginary crown :) for I know that it is not an easy feat to allow Femdom to reign over your life in a time and age where it is seen as an unforgivable weakness for a male to possess. The realist lives his life with the core belief that women are in charge,that they are the natural leaders,and that he is meant to follow not lead. He is respectful towards all women. He displays gentlemanly manners. He recognizes the reward of being allowed to live his life as it is meant to be lived..in service to women.
I have had many say to me that they cannot live a Femdom life because they have a "real" life to lead. This astounds me,and always leaves the impression that I am indeed dealing with a fantasist,for there is no excuse for not living such a life if you are male. Is there any cognitive reason why males cannot treat women with respect,why they would not be able to treat women not as objects of their own sexual gratification,or pawns for the achievement of their own ends? Those reasons appear rather selfish and self centered to me. Regardless whether you are a CEO or a fast food employee,you can serve women each and every day. You can speak to them with deference. You can train your sexually perverse mind to cease seeing them as jerk fantasies. You can donate to women's causes. You can promote the elevation of women in society and the workplace. The only thing that holds a male back is his own selfishness and sense of entitlement period!! This is something that the realist recognizes and overcomes,and that in itself earns you a "good boy"
So come not to me with excuses of cannot,but rather with an accounting of the steps you have taken to do so :) for I am ever the realist!
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