Velcro makes me itch with a capital B

The latest and greatest in affordable accessories for the "submissive" who has it all is the velcro collar. For some, this honored piece of bdsm tradition can be yours for a mere $10 tribute. Wow what a deal! I see so many people acquiring one, that surely it has become the most fashionable trend in the fetish scene today right? Who really cares if it is as faux as the knock off coach bags they market on the street corners in every large city? I mean it adds to your status and kink cred doesn't it, and who can really tell that it is not legitimate?

Well little ones here comes your wake up call! Everyone that is anyone whom has been around the scene for awhile can spot your velcro collar a mile away, and are giving your existence that much berth to avoid you as well. A collar of that caliber is indicative of the fact that you do not know shit about bdsm tradition (nor does the one whom gifted you with it), or possess enough respect for yourself to earn a collar the old fashioned way (through time devoted, and hard work provided).

Now many of you are thinking to yourself that this is a new age, and tradition don't mean squat to individuals that want what they want, when they want it, and how they want it right? Is this not the era of instant gratification, and does not technology afford you the opportunity to acquire exactly that? Life would not be fair if you yourself could not instantly possess the very same thing that a submissive whom has spent years working towards receiving it. You as a supremely entitled being have put a new spin on the antiquated drudgery of earning a collar, doesn't that make you all warm and fuzzy inside? You have outsmarted them all haven't you?  Minimal effort and minimal expenditure and voila, you are now a bonafide owned male. Gosh that was easy cheesy.

Look how grown up you appear with your new fancy dancy neck attire. Wow everyone will respect you now, won't they? After all, cries for attention are always met with the utmost of praise aren't they?

Ready for it, because I am going to tear off the bandaid quick like, hope you shave closely. You are a fool in a collared jester's suit, and that is exactly how you are viewed by your superiors and peers. So many of the best things in life are worked for and earned, not merely given freely, such as respect, trust, paychecks, and yes even collars. You truly do get exactly what you pay for in some instances, so if you are not concerned about your latest and greatest neck adornment leaving behind a telling green ring, then by all means go for it, but just in case you are one of those rare gentlemen that believes in hard work, and earning your way, then do yourself a favor and just say NO to velcro collars. Save up that $10, and invest in something real.