labels

So many complaints these days in the fetish community about fakes,liars and time wasters. I have been giving much consideration regarding my own definition to such labels,and wanted to share the conclusions I have reached.

Fake=Someone that has no intention of ever serving anyone except themselves. They enjoy yanking the chains of any dominant,while setting back laughing at the seeming duplicity.
Liar=Someone that makes promises that they have no intentions of fulfilling. (That does apply to Dommes as well)
Time waster=Someone that takes up precious time even when they recognize that they are not a good fit for the type of exchange that has been discussed.

There are many mitigating factors that play a role in these situations though. If a submissive/slave is just coming into the lifestyle,they may not have a comprehensive grasp of what role they fill,and need a dominant guide to aid them in the journey of self awareness. These are generally the individuals that are referred to as fake,and while it is without a doubt that indeed some are,there are many that do not deserve said title.
Another circumstance that comes to mind,is that a sub/slave may fear repercussions of angering a dominant if they make it known that it would not be a good match,therefore they attempt to merge into the woodwork,thereby earning them a black mark as a liar,fake,or time waster,when in essence they are not. Being submissive does not mean that you must serve any dominant that seeks you out. I would advise though,that once you have decided it would not suit,that you make all parties aware of it,to save yourself and the dominant in question,energy and effort that would best be expended elsewhere.

The key component is HONESTY.


If you are new and exploring only,make it known.
If you are seeking friends only to discuss the fetish/lifestyle,make it known.
Be truthful,and you will avoid the pitfalls that so many encounter.