Not all will worship you

One of the most difficult aspects to accept in the online realm hell even in real life is that you are not going to appeal to everyone. Believe it or not,not everyone worships you. It may be due to simple changeable points,but unfortunately it may be something that you have absolutely no control over which influences people against you. The most important thing to always keep foremost in your mind is that you are a beautiful,worthwhile woman regardless if others deem it fact!

I have seen this scene played out over and over,like an old vinyl record skipping and repeating. A lady enters the findom scene with high expectations of being feted and worshipped,yet it never comes to pass,and she is left pondering why. She sits back watching others being flocked to,whilst her inbox remains empty. Now this scenario may lead her along a couple of trains of thinking,such as "I am not hot enough,smart enough,thin enough,young enough,or even the race most sought out",and this in turn damages her ego,or worse yet elicits anger and envy(self-destructive emotions). This is when we see the melt down initiate. Either the lady will quietly exit the scene undetected,or she will become quite aggressive and snide in her tactics to garner the attention she desires.Unfortunately neither behavior is going to produce the longed for results.

Online can truly be a bitch of a workout to your insecurities,which is why I would never advise this course to anyone that does not have an unshakeable sense of self confidence. You must approach this arena with the knowledge that you are worthy of worship,and fuck all of the petty high school popular girl BS games(down playing others with the thought of it lifting you higher). You are elevated above such webs. Keep your goal purely focused,and when you run into a stumbling block,persevere. Absolutely you are not going to be what every male is looking for,but I guarantee that there will be one who sees the Goddess within you. It just takes time,maybe not in a day,a week or even a month,but it will happen.

The upside to an empty inbox is that you have more time to develop the skills needed to devastate minds and bodies,so put that time to good use,and when all else fails think about the little train chugging up the hill :) My point being,do not give up on you.

Get on your knees and bow before my beauty

Acceptable or insultingly pathetic

One of the frequently posed queries to me from both sides of the equation is "how much do I offer in tribute-how much of a tribute do I ask for?" This question is made difficult to respond to sans knowledge of mitigating factors such as,the amount of disposable income pertaining to the one offering tribute. I mean if the male in question works at a fast food venue he most likely is not going to be able to put forth the financial remuneration that the CEO of a fortune 500 company would. Make sense? Oh and for all of you new to the scene,a boy that works at McDonalds is not the most viable servant if the financial aspects are paramount to you,seeing as the national average of minimum wage has been shown to place an individual well below the poverty line.

Another tid bit to take into consideration is if the male in question has children,as this can and will greatly affect the determined amount. You would not want to fall into the cesspool of scum which would deprive a child now would you? One would think that this is something that the male would not put at risk,but we all know that when the dick makes the decisions,that they forget all other incidental circumstances,therefore we have a responsibility to keep it in mind.

Onto the meat of the matter. What is not an acceptable amount to offer or receive? My response is subjective which means that of course it is not a set in stone rule for the community as an entirety,and with that being said $10 is no different than a slap in the face. Ladies we all know that you put forth an extraordinary amount of time and energy into developing your skills as a Domina,as well as marketing yourself in the hopes of connecting with a kindred spirit,and how could it not be insulting to see such a poor token in your account. What does that amount say in regards to how your time and attention are valued? Not much huh?

Now of course the destitute males are going to balk at my statements,and yes I comprehend why. One plea they may make is that heartfelt servitude should mean more than money(yup some do attempt to guilt you into accepting a meager pittance using the line that a real Domme does not care about money),and I am sure that it doesn't when you are speaking with a strictly lifestyle Domme(yet even they will expect gifts),but anytime you are approaching a Lady of findom,you have to accept that tribute is not trivial. Hell even in the vanilla courtship realm you will get no where with $10...wake up! You cannot even take a female out on a date for that amount,unless of course you find a naive girl whom does not mind the dollar menu and redbox (good luck),so I advise you to save up before you make your first contact. You certainly do not want to be referred to as the laughingstock broke bitch by all of the ladies,now do you? Oh and get the thought out of your head that offering to do something vile ie drinking your jizz juice,or sticking an object up your ass is replaceable in lieu of tribute. In case you did not know it,we see these acts each and everyday online already.

Basically I see $25 as the bottom of the line tribute amount,now mind you this is not what I would charge for sessions if I offered them,but it is a starting point that a respectable finsub should be able to easily afford,and if not,then they should be seriously questioning whether they actually belong in this fetish. There you go :)

Service Guru informercial for the day

Are you tired of being passed over,kicked to the curb,or not even noticed at all by the gloriously gorgeous ladies of findom? If so my boys I am here to help you out.

Now take a seat,cause the ride is a bit bumpy and fraught with the winds of denial.

1)Your approach is the beginning of it all. It can either fan a flame or find you banished to the vanishing isle. Being such a compassionate guru I am going to show you the do's and do nots.
Okie Dokie here we go.

Do be polite when contacting a Domme. Examples "Lovely day to you my Lady","Good morning(afternoon,evening) Madam,Miss etc... my name is (insert your name),and I would like to take this opportunity to relay my appreciation for you as a dominant Lady,and hope that you will accept a token(tribute) as a sign of my sincerity". " I wanted to take a moment to relay to you my appreciation for the obvious hard work crafting your profile,and the dedication towards your skills as a Domina,in the hopes that you would allow me the honor of coming to know you"

Do not initiate contact in this manner. "Hey babe you are so hotttt,you make my cock wave hello" or "Yo momma you r da shit,how bout u make my fantasies rl?" or even "hi here is a pic of my dic,what do you think?" Yup true story,I have had these exact sentiments shared with me,do you think these individuals are serving me??? Oh and for the love of all that is real,do NOT copy and paste messages,especially if you are forgetful and leave the last ladies name in the introduction!

Dear boys there is a reason why you are not getting anywhere close towards engaging in a D's relationship,much less a vanilla one. Try a little something something for yourself next time. Try talking to the female you approach just as you would one you met in the middle of the day on a sunny street. Now does this include blinding her with the sight of your one eyed willy(hope not,cause you most likely cannot afford bail money). Do you look her in the eye and start sprouting how you want tied down and strap on fucked like an animal in heat (ouch does your head hurt from hitting the pavement after she racked you?) Do you offer her cash to see her tits and bits(sheesh have your balls ever came back out after the last kick)

The point boys is that you have to start learning from your mistakes. Man up,and realize that life does not revolve around you or your penis,no matter how much you love it doesn't mean that others give a fark that it exists,see?? You in fact do possess the power to start over,and do it the right way.

If you want to impress a Lady,then you are going to have to think with the head on your shoulders,not the naughty one that gets you racked ok? An introduction is what sets the tone for your relationship,so remember keep it clean,polite,and most of all respectful.

That is all for today,back to your regular perving pleasures :)

A name is a name is a name,or is it?

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet",but that does not mean that everyone would still stop to smell it! Imagine that rather than being called a rose,it were named shitstankoria. Would you still want a dozen of them delivered to you on Valentine's day lol?

What is in a name? Well in the online realm,your chosen username can say a great deal about you,in fact sometimes it makes an unforgettable or even undesirable first impression.

If you are a male submissive serious about serving a high caliber Domina long term,would you first contact a female whom calls herself *sluttyfucktart(ficticional name) or one named Domina4LTR(fictional name)? See the difference in appeal?*If you use this name,or know anyone that does,no offense intended :)

The same applies to a male's username. One of the very first things we ladies learn regarding names in the online financial forums is that certain monikers are generally(note I did not say entirely)reserved for true losers,and wank whappers. Names such as piggyloser,broke4u,atmman etc.... This is definitely one of those choices where straying from the pack of sheeple will gain you notice. I have many times waxed on and on about how important that very first impression is,as many times it may be the only one remembered about you,so why not put your best foot,or in this case username forward?

There is beauty in the suffering

"The Beauty We Glean From The Suffering We Have Endured Can NEVER Be Denied..  "

 Suffering,what truly is it in relation to serving as a submissive in a D's relationship? Is it contained to a single method? Must you be a masochist to suffer?

Being able to appreciate the beauty in suffering requires that you view the big picture rather than merely one singular aspect.

Is the male on his knees before his Goddess with stripes covering his back able to see the picture he presents? Does he recognize that the marks upon his flesh are ones of honor,can he grasp that the tears which rain down from his eyes do not mar the loveliness of the image,but rather enhance it?

The male whom locks up the appendage of his manhood,does he not struggle and suffer with his very nature,which demands that he be free to procreate? Is not his sacrifice a thing of beauty?

The slave whom willingly gives the entire of his known existence up for the privilege of becoming an extension of his owner,is he not the picture of beauty?

Regardless of whether one suffers in the flesh,spirit,or heart,there is beauty within the sacrifice.

"The most beautiful people we have known are those that have known defeat,known suffering,known struggle,known loss,and have found their way out of those depths."

There is no light without the dark

How can one appreciate the lighter aspects of the findom field,without acknowledging that a darker side exists? Sort of like the seedy side streets of a phenomenally beautiful city. Sometimes one must experience the not so lovely aspects in order to gain appreciation as well as to see the value of that which is worth pursuing.

Some will gloss over the disturbing facts that not all is happiness and sunshine in the findom fief,but why? I can only assume that we are advised to hush about that which does not evoke all of those delicious delights of the flesh,because the unsavory taste of such scares away the bees correct? Oh alas what a pity,it nearly breaks my cold heart,that my life is based upon a reality not erected upon catering to erections,one which deflates males jerking responses. Should I apologize,I think not.

By sealing our lips,are we not promoting the one dimensional persona that permeates and perpetuates that dominant women are not real people. Like an act affected,a role where the actress must look,and act in a predetermined manner. I ask you this,how the hell is it dominant being thrust into denying your humanity?

I dare one single individual to step up and deny that they have ever endured a moment of unhappiness,misery,physical pain,or plain emotional angst in their entire lifetime. It will never happen. Why? Because it would be a lie of monumental proportions...and after all who wants to be labelled a liar?

There are a multitude of reasons for developing a time of transitory displeasure within this often judged fetish.From without the glass peeking in,it all appears so shiny and awe inspiring,but upon closer inspection there is no denial that it is a roughly competitive arena to a great degree. How can something so very precious such as serving a dominant become so vile? Lets take an in depth look shall we.

I have seen profiles,and posts by the thousands,and interacted with roughly half that number,which if I were to take what I see and hear to heart,then I would have faded into the memories of past long ago. Obviously the fact that I am in my 30's makes me an undesirable potential Domme to the majority which seek out my young to life sisters,and that actually suits me fine,for why would I ever desire to be near those whom are so very close minded that they cannot see beyond their own eyes in regards to the beauty of experience and wisdom? It is only the juvenile mind which is hindered by the bedazzlement of the surface,and it is not a youth that I would take beneath my heel.

Services,services,services. Why is there a market for such? It comes back to the male mentality of entitlement,selfishness and insecurity. In a free market is there not movement to encroach into in demand areas? We call it customer-client exchanges. Do companies produce goods for the resale value,or for their own pleasure,well of course to make money dummy. Does this equate into you serving the company when you buy their product,NO. You may increase their bottom line profit,but you are not doing them a favor. You purchase the product for your pleasure only. Now how does this figure into findom? How many males buy clips or cam sessions? In fact how many of these same males feel entitled to calling the shots since they are paying for time and attention as a customer? I would love to see some actual figures,but I doubt that they would shock me,as I see this exact type of behavior daily. Can you see how this would be less than pleasing to a Domme whom offers no services,yet has need to explain it on a continuous basis that the words service and services are not interchangeable? I offer no services,but I expect service. Makes sense to a single celled amoeba,so why is it that it is not comprehendable to the majority?

Liar liar cheap pants on fire. What delight does one take in the repetitive rounds of worn out lose pocketed lies which befall from the lips of the hapless and hopeless? You cannot elevate your status with worth not your own,so for the love of all that you hold holy,cease and desist. Accept that poor is not a pretty adjective in a realm where coin has more meaning than willing flesh. There is a place for you,but it will not be named findom. Life is finite,so waste not yours where appreciation will not be yours.

For the faithless and oath breakers,they sincerely do reserve a seat for you in hades. Hurry before your spot is taken :) In olden days,your word was your bond,and truly some things never go out of style. Be honest,be real,and maybe one day redemption shall be yours,but along that road keep yourself true to that which falls from your tongue. Make not a commitment which you cannot or will not keep. It is your reputation that suffers with broken promises.

See you now why a bad day can be had for a lady of findom? The ugly truth is that just as in the vanilla setting,there are liars,losers,unfaithful,insulting and vulgarly demanding trolls,and yes being subjected to this behavior day in and day out is bound to produce a day of less than suzy sunshine happiness. The only redeeming glimmer is the hope that one day along will come those whom actually get what it means to be submissive. Ask yourself this,will your behavior bring to the equation light and smiles,or the darkest of frowns?