Findom success

Questions questions everywhere. How do I do this? How do I find paypigs? How do I get males to tribute?

I have composed hundreds of blogs so far about findom,the lifestyle,how to serve,how to be served etc... but the questions come in everyday,so here I go again :)

Findom is set apart from lifestyle bdsm, kinda weird I know, but one of the first things you will find out in this fetish is that it is very greatly looked down upon by "ordinary" bdsm members. It really sucks to be so very disdained by people who engage in most of the same activities as FinDommes do.  Hinky isn't it that Dominas who style themselves as "lifestylers" have no issue with receiving gifts which are used in play such as whips,floggers,strap-ons,stockings,heels,paddles,plugs and on and on,yet they consider FinDommes to be scammers and whores eh?

The only real differences between a lifestyle Domina and a FinDomme is money. FinDommes set a value upon their time and energy. They expect, nay, they demand that males drop the entire entitlement agenda, and tribute for the honor of being in the presence of a woman. In essence they force upon males the realization that women owe them nothing, and that if they desire her attention, than they should pay for it. FinDommes do not have sex with their servants, why, well cause if there is an exchange of money and sex occurs, that kinda falls into the category of prostitution, which is illegal in many countries still, and no one looks good in those orange jumpsuits. Lifestyle Dominas do engage in sexual acts though(not saying all, so don't twist your panties). Why do you think so many begging for pegging pissants flock to lifestylers huh? The sex baby, oh yeah! Sex itself seems to be a huge part of lifestyle play ie oral worship, rimming, strap-on play(oh just in case you are confused, anytime there is penetration or touching of genitalia, that goes under the umbrella definition of sex)..but this is not something you are going to expect a FinDomme to offer.

Now you might get the impression that I am bagging on lifestylers, but I am not. I respect all women who are just doing their thing. Women should empower each other, not sit in judgement.

Oops I went off on a tangent. Getting back to the topics at hand!

1)How do I do this? BE YOURSELF. Develop your own style. Play around with fetishes to see what you like. Don't put on a mask,and try to fake your way to the top (doesn't work,and if it did,then it would not be real). Keep your private details private to protect yourself (yes online stalkers and haters exist). Don't try to make a name for yourself by putting other females down (classless antic). Don't engage in drama..sheesh online drama is senseless and brings bad PR to all FinDommes. Be mature enough to realize that just like in ordinary life, you are not going to like everyone, nor they you, so rather than sling mud, just block and go baby.

2)How do I find paypigs? Sign up and fill out a detailed profile on fetish sites ie Collarspace, Fetlife, alt, findoms, Elite Financial Domination, seeking arrangements. Get a twitter, tumblr, blogspot, website(it is ok to start out with a free one like wix or weebly). I would go with wix to start with since it is free and fairly easy to navigate. There is no need to fork out for domain and hosting fees until you decide that findom is your niche.  Post content, share your thoughts thereby allowing prospective males to see what you are really about, take photos (Instagram is a good place to post),and yes even selfies are good so long as the background is not trash littered (try to avoid the bathroom room ones though,unless you are promoting an interest in watersports or scat) Videos even short ones like vine will gain you followers and notice. Don't fall for the you have to show your goodies to get notice (you don't) but feel free to do so if that is what YOU want to share with the world at large. Following through with these actions will get you noticed, and no you do not need to chase after males..if you are chasing, than the power balance shifts, plus it is tacky as hell. You build it (an online presence) and they will come, most likely cum too lol.

3)How to be served? Only you know what type of service you seek, and it is up to you to make that known. If you love sph, chastity etc, then make note of it in your profile, so that you will attract that type of male. If you do not want anything long term,or real time,SAY SO. If you just want the money,hey that is ok too,but be honest about it. Most of all, just have fun..do the things that you enjoy, and the rest will take care of itself!

4)How do I get males to tribute? This is definitely the trickiest one. You have to spend some time interacting with a prospective to figure this one out. Males have triggers, and they are they key. Now do not make the mistake of giving up hours of your day with any one male in the hopes of getting a tribute(not likely to happen),and you look foolish for having wasted your own time. I am not advocating that you not take the time to get to know a male,just that you go into it with the realization that the male you are speaking with may never tribute you. He may just be looking to use you for his sexual gratification for free (lots and lots play that game). To protect your interests (your time) it is ok to ask or expect a small tribute upfront before engaging in lengthy discussion,and if the notion is scoffed at,well you might just be better off blocking and going. You cannot make a findom connection with someone that will not honor you with tribute. Okies I know that last statement is gonna crinkle toes,but unless you are here for "friendship" willingness and ability to tribute matters in findom. You cannot disregard the "FIN" in financial domination, else it becomes an entirely different dynamic.

I wish all females success in the fetish realm,and hope that they grow in empowered from the experience :)

This coin does not flip

The financial domination universe is entirely out of whack due to actions perpetrated from females and males alike. Notice I said females,not Dommes,interesting eh? Let's talk about that.

There are literally hundreds of females in the findom playground,why? M O N E Y ! Now don't get my intent twisted,cause I am for all females,and believe they should do whatever enriches their lives,and pleases them most. Things get hairy though when the lines get erased between findom and provision of services. What I am basically saying is that a ton of males find themselves on cam sites,clip sites,or market places where sessions and items are sold,and whilst all is good in the neighborhood,that is NOT findom.

Peeps should have the google definition of findom bookmarked by now...it is a handy resource tool :) Now sit right back cause I am gonna break it down for you.

1)Buying a clip for your personal amusement,or gratification(wank spank) is NOT findom.
2)Buying a cam session to watch the pretty lady,or have her watch you,is NOT findom.
3)Buying used items for your jacking jerk off is NOT findom.
4)Calling NF for phone sex is NOT findom.
5)Tipping tokens in return for spoils back is NOT findom.

Notice how I used small words,so as not to confuse you? Gee whiz I am super nice :)

If you are purchasing product(clips,session,pedi dust,panties,used shoes etc..)you fall into the category of a customer/client,and the female is technically a service provider,rather than a Domme. Yes some in fact many Dommes do offer services,but if they are selling something,then that is NOT really dominating now is it? No,so you are NOT being dominated,therefore you are NOT serving. Ok here is where it can get tricky,if a Domme commands that you purchase her products,then in essence she is dominating you if you comply(confusing isn't it),but if you are just doing it all on your own for your satisfaction,then you are NOT being dominated,nor are you serving anything but your own kink.

What is findom then if nothing that I mentioned above,whelp I will spell it out for the lazy turds who won't use google.

Findom entails sending a tribute $$$ (non-reciprocal gift) to a dominant. Easy cheesy isn't it? No bargaining,no expectations,no force required.

Woot isn't it wonderful to have it explained to you! Knowledge is power baby,use it :)

dumbass alert

Some days I am left shaking my head at the blatantly illogical behavior of males who contact me. Take for instance one from this very day. It began well with him requesting to serve me,to which I questioned why he wanted to serve me in particular. His response was pleasing,with him affirming that he had already came here to my blog to research me(color me surprised),now this is where it gets dicey. I confirmed his knowledge that tribute would be required to serve,and he of course accepted such,but yet when he was informed that tribute is always in the form of an amazon gift,he poofed like puff the magic dragon's smoke.

Of course I am used to the antics of a serial time waster. This is findom after all,and it is a common tactical move,but what had me going "huh",was that he approached me not with the usual transparent ploys of wasters,for 1)no dick pics were sent 2)no fetish talk was exchanged 3)no mentions of what he wanted me to do to him,or even him asking what I would do to him. Makes no sense..the only conclusion I can arrive at is that he is a scared little boy who bolts when shit gets real,pity him,seriously do(he got blocked awww :()  We all know that I am a supreme Goddess worthy of worship,so you hurt only yourself by enacting such behaviors since I am not known for giving second chances.

Moral of the story,don't be a dumbass

Creation of a monster

Daily, written moans and bitches blight my sight online. A never ending cycle always in motion repetitively,to no avail. What complaint could it be that I refer to,well I speak of the dreaded time waster sagas discussed and beaten like a dead nag.

I am going to feed you the brutal truth of the creation of the blackguard himself,and it is going to rankle some,but we cannot seek to please all,or sweep the truth under the proverbial rug,if alterations are ever to come through.

The surprising part for most is that I am going to lay the blame where it truly belongs,and that is on the females in this fetish,yup I said it,and I mean it. Males are not totally inept intellectually,and like pavlov's dogs they do learn when actions are repeated which produce positive results. Take your average fetish male new to the scene,he comes along after having been conditioned by femdom porn,or even a bit of vanilla porn(ugh),so he has in his mind already decided what he believes should be the course of action right? Now some of his thoughts might actually align with what occurs in a lifestyle bdsm relationship,or even of that with an escort who offers a little fifty shades of grey action,BUT findom is an animal of an entirely different sort,so he is forced to configure new ways to meet his wants.

So,what is a male to do that wants attention,wants humiliation,wants degradation,but does not want to pay tribute for it? He may scratch his balls for a quick minute til he sees that hey he can achieve this goal easily,with minimal effort on his part. Looking at twitter,kik,and fetish sites it becomes apparent that to receive the humiliation he so desperately wants,all he has to do is post a photo of his dick,and boom all kinds of attention comes his way FREE,yay him(and before someone irately speaks out that they do not fall for this,take a quick peek and see how many do). Degradation oh yes sweet degradation..this one is easy as well. Left and right insults are hurled(you are fake,oops someone fell for the cam verify cause they feared being called an insta or worse a man!!)..call a woman fat,old or ugly,and lightening fast females will respond with insult after insult..oh great globs of slimy sperm yes,degradation has been freely relayed and received! Wants met at no cost to their wallet. Wow see how simple that was for him? How do we as females shove a cork in the ass of these actions,by remaining silent of course. STOP feeding the bitches with comments on their little dicks,cause that will not produce your due worship or tribute. All it does is teach males that they can have their cake and eat it too. Cease giving them a rise when they hurl inane comments towards your person. A confident dominant female does NOT care for the opinions of sheep,she knows that she is worthy of worship,and disregards commentary to the contrary.

Since we have spoken of time wasters,let's move on to the miserly scrooges abounding around. Just as with the previous mentioned,these males behaviors have evolved once again due to actions on the feminine front. Open your eyes,and you will see scads of females offering sessions for pennies on the dollar,accepting $10 tributes(puke). Of course it all adds up,but here is the thing,you as a female are of more worth than any male will ever assign you,and by valuing your time and energy so low,you are merely encouraging other males to devalue your time and attention as well. See the point I am making?  Findom is not about getting rich I know this full well,but it is a proven fact that males will take advantage of females if they are given the opportunity to do so,and no this is not a slight to males,merely the nature of the beast,so my question would be why do you as dominant women allow yourself to be treated shabbily,when you deserve so much more? Not every male in this fetish is a millionaire,but you surely know that they can do a hell of alot better than you are receiving! $10 is NOT a sacrifice..and please before someone gets pissy and says "oh yes it is if that is all they have in their pocket",well if that is all they have,then they need to save up,get a better job,or step away,cause what they are offering is an insult,so please do not fall prey to it.

The balance of power has shifted,and we as women have allowed it. Any female who allows a male to top from the bottom for a few bucks encourages it,any female who chases carrots encourages it,any female who feeds trolls encourages it...my point being that it is time to take command of the reins,and teach these males that they do not call the shots,they do not rule femdom or findom. Either take a stand,or lay down with the dogs,but most importantly quit bitching about time wasters,and cheap bitches if you are not going to be a part of the solution.

Judgement by default is your fault

Have you ever wondered why people online treat you like a piece of offal,even when that is not your fetish, boys? Human beings are flawed in nature,and have a tendency to judge others,by their words,actions,hell even by their car,home,or clothing..but online the last few really aren't tangible factors,for who other than you truly knows which possessions are yours or made up? Yes shockingly it is true that people lie online,especially in the findom realm. They fabricate luxurious lifestyles like those of the rich and famous,all the while hiding out in their infested shanty. They claim bill gate's bank balance even though they lack 2 nickels to rub together,hard to believe isn't it!!

The sad part is that honestly no one is fooled,and if they are,then I have a bozo button for them. I understand why it is perpetrated though. Males in society are judged by their possessions or lack thereof,therefore when they encounter a situation where they believe that they can fudge and get away with it,the temptation rules their better senses. Doesn't that one song speak of how you can be anything or anyone online,after all who will know right lol.

Well the truth is that it is quite telling who is being dishonest. First,people that possess an abundance of money,do not announce it(it is considered low class to do so),so red flags should appear anytime a male claims to be rich,or promise a windfall of tribute. Second,when a male refuses to share a facial photo(even after a few interactions) is a huge clue that he is hiding something vital,and considering that most Ladies I know aren't seeking to make a romantic connection with their servants(with only the delusional thinking elsewise)so what could they be hiding other than a Quasimodo appearance? I am always skeptical myself when I have no visual of who is serving me,thoughts bounce through my head like(are they underage,are they a serial killer,a stalker,my next door neighbor lol)

Some even lie about their gender,as in attempting to impersonate a female character,all the while holding their ding dong in their hand..this one is perhaps the most pathetic,for women are divine creatures to be held in the highest regard,unlike those who swing freely in their pants. Yes I just said that. I do see you as inferior to women,I have never made a secret of that,and no it is not a game I play at online. Those that play this game tend to ask Dommes to be their mentor(teach them what they do)or ask them to share stories about how they dominate submissives(yup they get off on living vicariously through another's experience).

They lie about what they will do ie:I will send a tribute lol(a tribute isn't real til the gift card is in your account,or the gift is in your hands),or I want to serve you,yet all that encompasses their mind is what they can get from a woman to sate their raging hard on(oh me so horny thinking,all they want to talk about is what turns them on),they even lie about their very name...oh yes the fetish world is overpopulated with john doe's,and john smith's.

There is a gigantic list of deceit executed by masses daily online(both sexes,sorry)but those who live in reality see the truth beneath the facade,which just may be why you receive what you deem unfair treatment,but in my eyes liars deserve nothing but scorn and ridicule,sorry not sorry. Moral of this post,DO NOT LIE!! To receive decent treatment,then you must first be decent.

To any that feel my comments are oh so negative in nature,they truly aren't since they are based in reality,no need to sugar coat a turd(it stinks even when you sprinkle pixie sticks on it),and the promotion of integrity in my opinion is a positive notion :)

Resting on your laurels

Have you heard that phrase before? Resting on your laurels is a lazy approach to life. How that fits into service I will explain.

In regards to findom,that initial tribute is perhaps one of the most difficult steps to take..you may labor over the decision weeks before approaching a Domme,and honestly you should do so. Doing your research on a Domme is essential to ensuring a positive connection. I mean if you are a sissified male,and the Lady you are reaching out to,detests sissys,then you are spinning your wheels,and wasting her time,makes sense yes?

If after doing your homework,you find yourself yearning to make that connection,then jump to it. Be prepared to tribute as a display of your appreciation,and do NOT attempt to attach strings to that tribute(tributes are gifts,not payments). Now that the hard part is past you,you believe that you can relax and breathe a bit right,no no no! You cannot rest on your laurels,or past actions so to speak.

During the consideration period you should be aspiring to stand out in regards to your viability as a servant. It is basically a courting phase,where your manners and best behavior need to be present and at attention. You should be attentive(even when life is tossing curve balls your way),remembering that you are the one who came to her,not vice versa,and if you are not willing or able to invest your time and energy into forging a bond,then you need to step out of the scene until you can do so.

It is not nearly enough if you are simply expecting the Lady to allow you to get by just sending a tribute every week. Service is a demanding and time consuming adventure,but surely the rewards are aplenty considering that you are provided the honor of a Domme's attention and presence,which means you should be showing your dedication and devotion,by taking that extra step to prove yourself worthy of the distinction.

Keep in mind gents,one solitary action does not define you as a submissive,nor will it keep you on the end of her leash :)

how much how much how much

Sharing is caring,and today I am going to share something with you my audience in regards to my experience when it comes to males posing the question "how much"?

A typical scenario goes as such

male:Hello Miss I would love to serve you

Me:Hello to you,have you read my profile,and comprehended what it entails in regards to expectations of service?

male:Yes Miss

Me:Very good. Are you prepared for the initial task which ALL prospective males must undertake in order to be considered?

male:Yes Miss

Me:The task is two part,and both must be completed in order to continue forward. 1)A poem personally composed in my honor. 2)An amazon gift card is to be sent to mzsydney34@yahoo.com in appreciation of my time.

male:How much should the gift card be for?

DING DING DING goes the bell cause you are out!

This is generally how it goes down,and the outcome is 100% in my experience the same,meaning that I receive no poem,nor a gift card,why...because they peckered off once they seen an amount. Regardless of the monetary amount named,they get off on hearing it,so alas I now cease all interactions when I have that query posed to me.

A male that truly wants to serve me,and please me,is NOT going to ask that question,for he knows that the first tribute is his first impression. Take note of this boys.

Not missing you at all

That was a great song yes? Anyways this is not a post about missing someone in the sense the song plays to though. The missing I am going to speak out about,is in reference to availability and diligent efforts towards communicating in a timely manner.

We all know that developing any type of relationship be it vanilla or kink takes some time,and that can be impeded if one party is not available when the other is. This tends to happen when two time zones collide in a rub of friction :p so to speak. I have lost sleep being around for gents,and no I am not complaining,just stating that I make time for those that are worthy,and expect no less from those seeking to become my own.

Now in the onset of interactions it is supremely important especially for you gents,to respond promptly to missives,and consistently apply this,else you are going to run into issues immediately. Allowing days to lapse in between correspondence is going to lead a Domme to assume that you are lazy(or just not that into her),and not worth her time. Now if the problem stems from differing hours,do be a good pet and explain this to your prospective Lady,for most are quite understanding,and will work some type of schedule out,but you cannot remain mum and expect her to read your mind(sorry,we do not all have those super powers yet).

If indeed it is that you are not really into her,and fear having her go ballistic on you about it,well you are going to have to strap on those big boy panties,and politely relay that you do not believe the two of you to be a good match(do not,I repeat do not just go silent,block her,or delete your account on a site to avoid her),and yes this can be done in a well mannered way. There is absolutely no need to insult her on top of it,capiche? Never burn your bridges to ash,for you do not know what the future holds,and it may turn out her bff is the one Lady you crave to serve above all others,see what I am saying?

We are all adults here,and comprehend that things come up in life that cannot be avoided,and may even take you out of the scene for awhile,but it only takes a moment to dash off a note telling a Lady that you will be out of reach for an undetermined amount of time,so please remember your manners gents,for it is likely that you yourself would not care to be left wondering what the hell happened to the Lady you were speaking to. After all,it is plainly pathetic to think that it just may be you playing this sappy song wishing that you weren't missing her because you lacked decency.

The honeymooners

Aw the honeymooners(no I am not talking about Alice&Ralph). The honeymoon(or courting) phase of a D's relationship,especially one which involves the beloved findom aspect,is an absolute rush. Like the pistons on a locomotive,tributes tend to pump fast and furious in this stage...where the simple sight of a username dries the mouth,pounds the pulse,and heightens all sense of anticipation. It is a heady experience,beautiful,yet dangerous as well,for this is the stage where often we see overpromising,and underdelivering..or worse yet,a boy goes beyond his means,and becomes bereft of the needed income to survive,and honor financial commitments til the next pay period.

It is not only males who are vulnerable and at risk for pushing too far at this point. It is the duty of a respectable and trustworthy dominant to ensure that no harm occurs,and whilst the reasoning could be applied that these are grown ass men capable of deciding for themselves if they want to be broken,we must as Dommes  maintain a degree of responsibility(atleast we should do so). If we do not control the depth to which they plunge,then we run the very realistic danger of breaking a boy,which is a lose lose.

Sometimes I fear that a cold and clinical atmosphere(strictly keyboard-monitor relationship) possesses the possibility of detaching one from a sense of compassion and regard for the very realistic consequences of allowing boys to go for broke. I completely understand the almost orgasmic pleasure of seeing tribute after tribute spoiling our accounts,and recognize how difficult it can be to say no to something that feels so good..but being grounded in reality aids me,and allows me to take a step back and maintain control of the situation. I truly believe that a leader leads by example,and cannot guide the way if judgement is clouded by hunger,hunger for the almighty dollar. Yes money is both loved and hated. It is chased,and responsible for some of the most despicably base actions of human beings,and yet we need it to survive in this world,ironic.

Navigating the honeymoon phase is a learned experience,and yet still there is room for error. I avoid these pitfalls by taking this time to delve further into the mind of the submissive,for these are the moments when he is most vulnerable,and most likely to open up to you. He desires only to please you,which is a gift greater than money. If this desire is nurtured,it can develop into a longterm addiction for him,thereby gracing your life with a male who seeks the enrichment of your existence,and that is worship in my estimation. Of course a male is easily led by his libido,but that will not capture his mind,and once the ejaculation is over,so might his craving to serve be as well,which is why one should grasp this golden opportunity to swim in the darkest recesses of his psyche,enslaving him to your will.

Once past this phase,the work begins in earnest,and requires time and effort from both sides,yup I said it. It would be lovely if all I had to do was just sit back and watch hapless males fall prey to my appearance,but that just won't cut it if I want to forge a lasting bond. The formation of a bond is not going to happen overnight. It takes sacrifice(many an hour of sleep have I lost,spent interacting,and really getting to know a boy,the facets of his life,and aspects of his personality,not just his kinks) I recognize the importance of kinks meshing,but if I cannot stand the male as a human being,then it will not matter a lick if we like the same activities.

I realize that longterm is not the goal for everyone,and that is absolutely cool(no judgement from me),and of course I understand that some crave to always be going through the honeymoon phase by either bouncing Domme to Domme...or in the case of the Domme,draining one after another dry..and I say whatever tickles your fancy :)...just don't play that game with ME,and all will be well!

Anyways,the prime message I wanted to send out is that at some point we must all exercise some degree of control,lest harsh realities be visited upon our asses,either in the form of not being able to pay bills,buy food etc for the boys,or lack of worthy worshipful servants for the Ladies. Good luck to all,and may you be blessed with what you seek :)

Be not needy for my time

Many a time I have advised males against being needy as it deters you from being an attractive applicant for service,but apparently some do not care to heed my sage words,which does not end well for them with me. To prove my point,I am going to share with you a non-fiction story about the last little needy male who attempted to ingratiate himself into my service.

It all began with the usual entreaties to serve me in any manner I desired,nothing atypical here yet. Now this male proclaimed to be a poor boy,with a girlfriend,so he required discretion with tasks and time,and I condescended to set him on a trial period.

His hope was to be an assistant of sorts to me,to construct a website for me,and even supplied a link to one he had made for another female,which I found to be of poor quality,so I vetoed that idea immediately. This led to him attempting to configure ways to enrich my life by drawing in servants of my desired caliber=fail. How this fails is laughable. A male promoting me on twitter works right??? Hell to the no it does not. The followers of males,are females,and that achieves nothing for me. I follow plenty of females as it is,and believe me when I say that telling them how awesome I am does not gain me riches of any sort lol

We progress,now I charge him with researching topics of interest for me...mind you this is all over a 3 day period,and during this time he has gifted me with a single measly $25 tribute(yup pathetic). With this single tribute he asks daily when he can have cam with me,and expects continuous interactions day in day out. Do you see where this is going?? His neediness is wearing out my tolerance.

After the completion of a piss pouring task over his head,I agree to speak with him via skype in one week from that day. You would think that he would be overjoyed yes? Oh no,he continues with the email after email,which I tend to disregard if I am busy actually having a life. How utterly selfish of me.. An entire day goes by,and suddenly he is going back to the female he was previously serving. I of course bid hm well,and forget about him entirely.

Fast forward a month...lo and behold there is an email in my inbox begging to return,which I let sit for a couple of days. I then proceeded to inform him that he could not gain my attention with a paltry $25,so he sent $50,and once again the entire saga starts over with continous emails,and expecting cam,even though I explained that I had family visiting for the week,and what do you dear audience think happened? Oh yes you guessed it,he once again begged leave to serve elsewhere. This time though,I relayed to him that he is now banned from my presence. Does that seem cruel?? I do not think so....neediness and poor are not qualities which make a servant worthwhile in my eyes...so fare thee well I say,and please do find a shite filled toilet to drown your sorrows in :)

This is what happens to the needy. Do not allow yourself or your actions to emulate this loser,if you want to serve me.

Time waster tips for Dommes

One of the recurring questions you will see posed on any financial domination forum is,"how do I find slaves", and whilst I do not have a tried and true, absolute guaranteed methodology to offer, I can tell you how to spot the manure before it has time to ferment, thereby saving time, which would have otherwise been wasted.

Behavior of a time waster
1)They will effusively compliment you. Now of course it is simply good manners to praise a Lady, but it can be overboard, such as "you are the most gorgeous woman in the world"(overkill). Their compliments may as well include sexual undertones, or hints of  sexually objectifying you ie "your tits, ass, pussy, make me so hard" "i want to jack off looking at you". I realize that some ladies enjoy using their bodies to ensnare the male senses ,and I say whatever works for you go for it, but remember this, if all they see you as is a sexual object, than they will not view you as a real human being, one that lives, breathes, gets ill, has bad days etc...and how can you expect or exact respect when all you are is a tool of sexual gratification in their eyes (wank fodder)?

2)They will brag about how much money they make, or possessions they have. This is a huge red flag, because this is not something people ordinarily bring up immediately, and those that boast tend to prevaricate. It is fairly easy to aver that one is flush with riches, all the while sitting in their parents basement, so be wary of those that attempt this ploy. The best way to avoid this trap is to operate under the saying of "money talks, and bullshit walks", so if they cannot offer even a token tribute for your time, then exercise your block button.

3)They will attempt to get you to cam verify. Of course there are exceptions to this, and yes there are some legitimate submissives who will ask you to verify, but they are also the ones that are willing to tithe you for the honor beforehand, so keep in mind that anytime you are asked to cam verify that you are possibly going to be wasting time as they sit back plucking their puke stick. One of the ways I judge the situation is, if the male in question has offered to do all sorts of activities for you prior to tribute being mentioned, but demands a cam verify once tribute is mentioned, than they are most likely a waster.

4)They will question you as to what you would do in a given situation, this is a classic ploy. "what would you do to my cock during cbt" "how would you tease and deny me". These males are best left to their own devices (rosie palm, and her 5 sisters), and far away from your inbox.

5)They will right out of the box insult you in some manner or form in the hopes that you will relinquish your control and tear them a new asshole, effectively providing them with humiliation and degradation. It is sincerely not worth the time you would spend typing up a scathing reply. I rarely respond to such, but I have been known to wish them a lovely day before I block them. Killing them with kindness is a bitch to their agenda.

6)They will send you unsolicited penis pics (just ewww). Any male that disrespects you, and yes this is disrespectful, is only playing to their own agenda, rather than seeking to serve, so it is best not to respond at all to them.

7)They will attempt to ingratiate themselves into your life as a "friend", and of course blatantly or subtly try to coerce details out of you, such as how you dominate males, or what you have done to other males. They want to live vicariously through those that have served, without ever serving.

These tips apply to all Dommes across the board, regardless of being into financial domination or not. Never forget that you are here to be served, rather than serve, and if you fall prey to a time waster, than you are serving them. Most of us have fallen prey to these scenarios when we were new so, do not beat yourself up if it has happened to you. All of us have been new at one time or another, and had to learn the hard way.

Findom merry go round

This past week for me has been a study in patience due to the deceitful nature of those I have come into contact with. To know me,is to know that I have always invested time in getting to know those that come calling with the supposed intention of submitting to my dominance,prior to the expectation of initial tribute,but (and this is a big but) I have found this action to be counterproductive,and in fact detrimental to my time schedule.

It is common knowledge within the financial domination realm that one should expend with a prospective submissive only the amount of time that they feel comfortable with having wasted if by chance the one contacting them is either a poor match,or a lover of lies. Generally I am a spot on judge of character when it comes to whether the person I am speaking with is going to fail upon the first task allotted to them (tribute),but even I can be on the fence when it comes to some,which in that case I usually give the benefit of the doubt. This is where change is going to be enacted,atleast with me. Have no doubt that if this new rule effects you,you will know it,for I am not shy when it comes to showing a male the way out of my inbox.

Sadly though for Dommes,there are entirely too many that will attempt to get on the merry go round of financial domination sans a ticket. They will claim that either a)they need to get to know you or b)that you are only in the fetish for the money. In response to (a) I am more than willing to spend time "getting to know" each other,after you have shown me that you are capable of seeing to the fin side of the equation. That sounds greedy does it not,but the truth is that,financial domination is not based solely on domination,and to expect otherwise is you fooling you,not the other way around,so be prepared to prove yourself worthy of attention,and (b)of course I financially dominate because of the money. Don't get it skewed though. I love and I mean love dominating males,but the financial aspect is the butter on my baked potato,and without it,it is just a plain bland potato.

Unfortunately sometimes there is this never ending cycle which infiltrates the best intentioned interactions,in that the male(you)refuses to tribute til he feels comfortable with me,and I(Domme)refuse to take the conversation any further til you have tributed. Both sides feel that they are correct,so neither gives,and what happens in that particular situation is that I sever all connections between us,and you lose out of ever speaking with me again,so my advice is to simply tribute. I am not saying that it need be a shockingly large amount,in fact as I said,even a token amount will assure me that you are serious. Now this is never even an issue when I am corresponding with the type I describe next.

Gentlemen admirers are my preferred type of servant,hardly shocking. One of the things I have noticed when it comes to a gentleman admirer is that they are courteous,respectful,and steer clear of sexual innuendos or queries as to how or what I would do in fetish scenarios. They spend their time in my presence getting to know me as a woman,rather than as a fetish vending machine,and they would never attempt to bother me with unsolicited penis photos,for that is ill becoming of a man who respects women. The absolute action I have noted when dealing with a gentleman is that he will always without mention of it,send a token of his appreciation,and that is what pleases me most,so if you want to get off to a good start with me,take a page out of the gentlemanly book of behavior!

Guys gone bad

***Disclaimer***
In no way shape of form does this post resemble certain videos or commentary released in said videos which is based upon sophomoric female actions.

In fact this post pertains to the title specifically. Not many Ladies contain their online presence to a mere site,and I do not differ in that train of thinking(more is better,and less is less likely to happen).
Anyway I have spent a great deal of my time these last few days logged into a site which has earned a gimlet glare from an unprecedented amount of Ladies in the financial domination fetish(bet each and every Domme knows which one I am referring to).

The real reason I indulge my presence there so much,is that it has been the most successful for me in the action of acquiring servants,shocking that my appeal is better received on a site not geared to my chosen fetish over a site that is(yup I scratch my head over that one too). These last few days though have seriously tried my patience. My profile there does not spell out in direct terms that I engage in financial domination(against their TOS),but it is easily deduced seeing as I mention twice that I do not engage in training for free,but no different than other sites, male members are notoriously disrespectful in that they do not read profiles. Reading profiles is something I have taken to the podium over, many many times,yet it never changes. Could it be that I am flogging a dead nag,or that bausch and lomb could be in the market for a substantial financial windfall due to all of the males with faulty eyesight(maybe pulling that puke stick so much really does rob males of their vision).

Of course I do not ever just assume that a male has read my profile,so I generally ask point blank if they have,even those that I know for a fact have not(I inserted in the first and last sentence of my profile how I am to be addressed),so when I get a message starting out with Miss,Ma'am,or Mistress, I know that my words have gone unread. I am polite though,and point out that it is important for them to read it,in order to form an opinion of whether they are a good match for me,or if we are ill suited,yet many still do not bother ack! So dear reader can you guess how this scenario progresses from bad to worse?

Let's pretend that you cannot for the sake of my content running short. Well most often said males will start off by proclaiming that they want to serve me,to do anything for me,perform any action which will make them mine(heard that one about a thousand times,and no I am not overestimating). Now comes the butthurt part. I remind them that I employ financial domination in every single D's exchange,for I view it as simply another aspect of TPE,no not the entirety,but a part of it. Whelp,oh my gosh the tone of the interaction changes,and that is if they respond at all,so we go from begging to belong to me to static silence. Sheesh all of this could have been avoided,all they had to do was read my profile first. Something so simple,yet laziness or loss of blood flow to the top head(due to photo erecting erections) prevented it's accomplishment.

The moral of the story is once more to read read read,and for all of the douche canoes that even when caught out,lie and pretend that of course they knew about my penchant for financial domination,and definitely they are more than happy to serve in such way,yet turn tail and scamper away when the time comes to put their money where their words proclaimed intent,well,I do wish you the best in finding what your heart(not your dick)seeks,and if you just happen to stumble and fall ass first onto a cactus,it would not bother me a bit :)

tic toc frenzy

Do you hear the clock ticking? Can you feel your heartbeat pounding in time with it? Are you like Alice's rabbit...running around like you are late? If so,then you are not alone.

Sadly it is actually humorous to see all the little brand spanking new boys scrambling about in an attempt to get owned up right away. I mean isn't that what it's all about anyway? The euphoric rush of getting exactly what you want when you want it. You enter the scene,make your desires known,and wham bam thank you Ma'am you're now owned. Gosh isn't it wonderful!!!

Of course that is until you take a step back(do be a good boy and remove your dick from your hand first) and look around. What do you see? Oopsy people are laughing at you,and not in the good(oh humiliate me for being a loser)way...nope you have now through your own inept actions made it clear that you are a dumbass sans an ounce of common sense. That is what happens when you allow your actions to be led by the little head.

No worries though little grasshopper,you are not the only one being laughed at. The key is for you to learn from this experience. Will you grow and take this lesson to heart,or will you wander around like one of little bo peeps sheep is the question.

We all start somewhere,and everyone one of us in the fetish scene have made mistakes(regardless whether they have seen the light of day),but those with the longevity required to last,do strive to turn the negative into a positive,so do not flagellate yourself over the fact that you jumped into a situation entirely too quickly. You are not the first nor will you be the last to join the scene and agree to become owned within an hour,a day,or even a week,but you can use your brain to take steps towards never allowing yourself to rush in without time and consideration ever again. Generally it is the Domme's duty to ensure that this does not happen,but apparently you cannot always count on it,so be prepared to do so yourself(you are a big boy right?).

In a realm where you are barked at hourly to pony up,keep in mind that your revenue is best saved for one that you take the time to get to know,and one whom is worthy of your offering,so keep that change in your pocket until you have chosen wisely rather than rashly,and you just might find the experience rewarding instead of laughable as the 15 minutes of fame for being the star of the findom comedy relief.

To Worship a Goddess

What does the title of this post mean to you? Ponder your response whilst I enlighten you with data which you may not have taken into consideration.

Wiki defines worship as such

"Worship is an act of religious devotion usually directed towards a deity. An act of worship may be performed individually, in an informal or formal group, or by a designated leader.
Worship asserts the reality of its object and defines its meaning by reference to it"

 with the origin being "The word is derived from the Old English weorþscipe, meaning worship, honour shown to an object,which has been etymologised as "worthiness or worth-ship"—to give, at its simplest, worth to something"

Now I ask you,what does the word worship mean to you? Does your definition differ from what is posted above? If you are male,and reading this,then I am going to go out on a limb,and bet that it does. How can I possibly know this,whelp it is certainly not because I possess the power of extra sensory perception. It is simply that I know the nature of the male beast,which has been proven day in and day out when one takes the time to read through the dialogue males post.

The term worship has become entirely convoluted,especially within the lovely findom fetish. Rather than males bowing down,and sincerely offering honor,it has now jumped the precipice of insult. I know not,nor care for the state of your immortal or lack thereof soul,rather my query would be if any of you regardless of whether you are a Christian,buddist,muslim etc...would walk up to the icon of your choosing,and spew out the words"Oh I worship your ass,tits,pussy,(you get my point yes????)

Of course you would not think to dish out such dishonor,so why then would you do so to one whom you claim as your Goddess? It is beyond reprehensible. Oh and yes I am aware that many upon many females bear no issue with this type of interaction,and that is their prerogative,not mine. My views have always,and will forever be that worship is NOT sexual in nature,I mean seriously do you see any mention of sex,or sexuality within the frame of the definition provided? How does your dick getting hard by looking at anatomy parts equate to worship? It simply doesn't,so please do refrain from attempting to argue the point. Either way you are wrong.

Now blah blah blah disclaimer,yes I know not all males are like this,so no need to say it.

Not all will worship you

One of the most difficult aspects to accept in the online realm hell even in real life is that you are not going to appeal to everyone. Believe it or not,not everyone worships you. It may be due to simple changeable points,but unfortunately it may be something that you have absolutely no control over which influences people against you. The most important thing to always keep foremost in your mind is that you are a beautiful,worthwhile woman regardless if others deem it fact!

I have seen this scene played out over and over,like an old vinyl record skipping and repeating. A lady enters the findom scene with high expectations of being feted and worshipped,yet it never comes to pass,and she is left pondering why. She sits back watching others being flocked to,whilst her inbox remains empty. Now this scenario may lead her along a couple of trains of thinking,such as "I am not hot enough,smart enough,thin enough,young enough,or even the race most sought out",and this in turn damages her ego,or worse yet elicits anger and envy(self-destructive emotions). This is when we see the melt down initiate. Either the lady will quietly exit the scene undetected,or she will become quite aggressive and snide in her tactics to garner the attention she desires.Unfortunately neither behavior is going to produce the longed for results.

Online can truly be a bitch of a workout to your insecurities,which is why I would never advise this course to anyone that does not have an unshakeable sense of self confidence. You must approach this arena with the knowledge that you are worthy of worship,and fuck all of the petty high school popular girl BS games(down playing others with the thought of it lifting you higher). You are elevated above such webs. Keep your goal purely focused,and when you run into a stumbling block,persevere. Absolutely you are not going to be what every male is looking for,but I guarantee that there will be one who sees the Goddess within you. It just takes time,maybe not in a day,a week or even a month,but it will happen.

The upside to an empty inbox is that you have more time to develop the skills needed to devastate minds and bodies,so put that time to good use,and when all else fails think about the little train chugging up the hill :) My point being,do not give up on you.

Acceptable or insultingly pathetic

One of the frequently posed queries to me from both sides of the equation is "how much do I offer in tribute-how much of a tribute do I ask for?" This question is made difficult to respond to sans knowledge of mitigating factors such as,the amount of disposable income pertaining to the one offering tribute. I mean if the male in question works at a fast food venue he most likely is not going to be able to put forth the financial remuneration that the CEO of a fortune 500 company would. Make sense? Oh and for all of you new to the scene,a boy that works at McDonalds is not the most viable servant if the financial aspects are paramount to you,seeing as the national average of minimum wage has been shown to place an individual well below the poverty line.

Another tid bit to take into consideration is if the male in question has children,as this can and will greatly affect the determined amount. You would not want to fall into the cesspool of scum which would deprive a child now would you? One would think that this is something that the male would not put at risk,but we all know that when the dick makes the decisions,that they forget all other incidental circumstances,therefore we have a responsibility to keep it in mind.

Onto the meat of the matter. What is not an acceptable amount to offer or receive? My response is subjective which means that of course it is not a set in stone rule for the community as an entirety,and with that being said $10 is no different than a slap in the face. Ladies we all know that you put forth an extraordinary amount of time and energy into developing your skills as a Domina,as well as marketing yourself in the hopes of connecting with a kindred spirit,and how could it not be insulting to see such a poor token in your account. What does that amount say in regards to how your time and attention are valued? Not much huh?

Now of course the destitute males are going to balk at my statements,and yes I comprehend why. One plea they may make is that heartfelt servitude should mean more than money(yup some do attempt to guilt you into accepting a meager pittance using the line that a real Domme does not care about money),and I am sure that it doesn't when you are speaking with a strictly lifestyle Domme(yet even they will expect gifts),but anytime you are approaching a Lady of findom,you have to accept that tribute is not trivial. Hell even in the vanilla courtship realm you will get no where with $10...wake up! You cannot even take a female out on a date for that amount,unless of course you find a naive girl whom does not mind the dollar menu and redbox (good luck),so I advise you to save up before you make your first contact. You certainly do not want to be referred to as the laughingstock broke bitch by all of the ladies,now do you? Oh and get the thought out of your head that offering to do something vile ie drinking your jizz juice,or sticking an object up your ass is replaceable in lieu of tribute. In case you did not know it,we see these acts each and everyday online already.

Basically I see $25 as the bottom of the line tribute amount,now mind you this is not what I would charge for sessions if I offered them,but it is a starting point that a respectable finsub should be able to easily afford,and if not,then they should be seriously questioning whether they actually belong in this fetish. There you go :)

Service Guru informercial for the day

Are you tired of being passed over,kicked to the curb,or not even noticed at all by the gloriously gorgeous ladies of findom? If so my boys I am here to help you out.

Now take a seat,cause the ride is a bit bumpy and fraught with the winds of denial.

1)Your approach is the beginning of it all. It can either fan a flame or find you banished to the vanishing isle. Being such a compassionate guru I am going to show you the do's and do nots.
Okie Dokie here we go.

Do be polite when contacting a Domme. Examples "Lovely day to you my Lady","Good morning(afternoon,evening) Madam,Miss etc... my name is (insert your name),and I would like to take this opportunity to relay my appreciation for you as a dominant Lady,and hope that you will accept a token(tribute) as a sign of my sincerity". " I wanted to take a moment to relay to you my appreciation for the obvious hard work crafting your profile,and the dedication towards your skills as a Domina,in the hopes that you would allow me the honor of coming to know you"

Do not initiate contact in this manner. "Hey babe you are so hotttt,you make my cock wave hello" or "Yo momma you r da shit,how bout u make my fantasies rl?" or even "hi here is a pic of my dic,what do you think?" Yup true story,I have had these exact sentiments shared with me,do you think these individuals are serving me??? Oh and for the love of all that is real,do NOT copy and paste messages,especially if you are forgetful and leave the last ladies name in the introduction!

Dear boys there is a reason why you are not getting anywhere close towards engaging in a D's relationship,much less a vanilla one. Try a little something something for yourself next time. Try talking to the female you approach just as you would one you met in the middle of the day on a sunny street. Now does this include blinding her with the sight of your one eyed willy(hope not,cause you most likely cannot afford bail money). Do you look her in the eye and start sprouting how you want tied down and strap on fucked like an animal in heat (ouch does your head hurt from hitting the pavement after she racked you?) Do you offer her cash to see her tits and bits(sheesh have your balls ever came back out after the last kick)

The point boys is that you have to start learning from your mistakes. Man up,and realize that life does not revolve around you or your penis,no matter how much you love it doesn't mean that others give a fark that it exists,see?? You in fact do possess the power to start over,and do it the right way.

If you want to impress a Lady,then you are going to have to think with the head on your shoulders,not the naughty one that gets you racked ok? An introduction is what sets the tone for your relationship,so remember keep it clean,polite,and most of all respectful.

That is all for today,back to your regular perving pleasures :)